Details Not Required

This week, I reconnected with a college friend I'd lost contact with a few years after graduation. Tom was truly more like college family than college pal. Our senior year my roommate Melinda and I intentionally selected dorm rooms next to Tom and his roommate. My best description of dorm life that year was akin to Laverne & Shirley episodes. I can recall many occasions, a quick knock on my door, which would almost simultaneously open to reveal Tom (whom I'll refer to as "Lenny") and his roommate "Squiggy" stopping in to say "hi" or just to drive me crazy for a few minutes - silly moments that can still bring a smile to my face today.

Tom was known to barter Stella D'oro cookies for a strong cup of coffee during late night study sessions (I kept a rather well stocked dorm room, complete with coffee maker, hot plate, fridge & toaster oven). When we weren't busy studying (OK, I think only Tom really studied that much...), we often socialized in my room and shared lifes ups and downs together. Over time, we became more like brothers and sisters, which led to the occasional bickering and/or irritation with each other you would expect with family members living in close quarters, but I think we all enjoyed our college days thanks in great part to those close-knit bonds we created.

While alot of years have passed since we last communicated, my recent e-mails to and from Tom have been easy exchanges of everyday angst tinged with humor - just like our communications back in college - only filled now with more immediate details of our present lives. I was pleased to learn Tom is married and the proud, sleep-deprived father of 3 young children. We've shared a few updates on other mutual friends from our college days. In one of our early emails, Tom stumbled upon one one particular topic and my short response to his question was all it took for Tom to write me back the most poignant thing he's written me so far; "some things are OK to let go - door closed."

That's how you know you've re-connected with a true friend - someone who doesn't need to ask about the details - because they somehow already know what's been left unsaid. And that's the kind of friend you welcome back into your life with open heart and open arms.